Anakin Skywalker (
morally_cryptic) wrote2016-11-30 11:21 am
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[for
fulcra, an AU]
Padme had tried to dissuade him from this and of course she'd made plenty of good points.
You saw the report too, she was reported dead on Mandalore.
Which was true but then...he's seen the report that went out reporting his death in the Jedi Temple so really, how much stock can he really put into that?
They're hunting Jedi still, Anakin and you know Palpatine is hunting you specifically.
Maybe, but Anakin was determined not to live his life in fear of the old man. Not after all of the lies. Not after what he had done and what Anakin had done for him. Let them catch him, he thought a little recklessly, and when they brought him before Palpatine he'd do what he should have done that night in Palpatine's office.
There'd been other arguments given as she tried to convince him not to go on this hunt for someone who was likely dead with no other evidence that Ahsoka was alive save Anakin's conviction that if she weren't, he would know it...feel it in the Force somehow. The only thing Padme hadn't tried was what might be termed the nuclear option: using their children as motivation for him to not leave them.
She might have won the argument with that, at least for the time being, but he would have been hard pressed to forgive her for it.
And so she let him go after extracting from him a promise to send her frequent updates as to his progress...which was really just a way of saying she wanted to not have to worry whether he was lying dead somewhere or captured and being taken to the Emperor.
Privately, Padme wondered if Anakin's determination to track down Ahsoka had as much to do with attempting to assuage his guilt for what had happened in the Jedi Temple as to assuring himself that she was safe.
For Anakin it took a few weeks of chasing vague feelings from the Force and rumors of a Togruta female seen carrying lightsabers (one of those rumors had led him on completely the wrong track and he'd wasted days only to find a Twi'lek trader with stolen lightsabers...suffice to say that trader was no longer in possession of them). Eventually, his path took him to Takodana and Maz Kanata's castle. This tip was supposedly actually good. It had come from Padme, of all people, and though she hadn't said as much in her message he was pretty certain she'd actually gotten it from Organa.
It feels right, too, he thinks as he lands even if he's not getting any more specific feelings about it. For now he'll take it.
When he enters the castle and finds his way to a table, no one gives him much of a second glance...which is just fine by him. The average person who might have known what Anakin Skywalker looked like would be expecting someone with longer hair, Jedi robes, and a prosthetic arm covered with a heavy glove. This Anakin Skywalker has cut his hair, taken up dressing in well-worn spacer gear, and he'd finally gone the route of having his arm covered in synthflesh so to look at him one would never know he'd lost it in the first place. Also, it appears he's got a blaster on his hip instead of a lightsaber.
Sighing, Anakin orders a drink and settles in to wait. The tip hadn't said when she'd be there, just that it was likely to be "soon".
He really hates waiting.
You saw the report too, she was reported dead on Mandalore.
Which was true but then...he's seen the report that went out reporting his death in the Jedi Temple so really, how much stock can he really put into that?
They're hunting Jedi still, Anakin and you know Palpatine is hunting you specifically.
Maybe, but Anakin was determined not to live his life in fear of the old man. Not after all of the lies. Not after what he had done and what Anakin had done for him. Let them catch him, he thought a little recklessly, and when they brought him before Palpatine he'd do what he should have done that night in Palpatine's office.
There'd been other arguments given as she tried to convince him not to go on this hunt for someone who was likely dead with no other evidence that Ahsoka was alive save Anakin's conviction that if she weren't, he would know it...feel it in the Force somehow. The only thing Padme hadn't tried was what might be termed the nuclear option: using their children as motivation for him to not leave them.
She might have won the argument with that, at least for the time being, but he would have been hard pressed to forgive her for it.
And so she let him go after extracting from him a promise to send her frequent updates as to his progress...which was really just a way of saying she wanted to not have to worry whether he was lying dead somewhere or captured and being taken to the Emperor.
Privately, Padme wondered if Anakin's determination to track down Ahsoka had as much to do with attempting to assuage his guilt for what had happened in the Jedi Temple as to assuring himself that she was safe.
For Anakin it took a few weeks of chasing vague feelings from the Force and rumors of a Togruta female seen carrying lightsabers (one of those rumors had led him on completely the wrong track and he'd wasted days only to find a Twi'lek trader with stolen lightsabers...suffice to say that trader was no longer in possession of them). Eventually, his path took him to Takodana and Maz Kanata's castle. This tip was supposedly actually good. It had come from Padme, of all people, and though she hadn't said as much in her message he was pretty certain she'd actually gotten it from Organa.
It feels right, too, he thinks as he lands even if he's not getting any more specific feelings about it. For now he'll take it.
When he enters the castle and finds his way to a table, no one gives him much of a second glance...which is just fine by him. The average person who might have known what Anakin Skywalker looked like would be expecting someone with longer hair, Jedi robes, and a prosthetic arm covered with a heavy glove. This Anakin Skywalker has cut his hair, taken up dressing in well-worn spacer gear, and he'd finally gone the route of having his arm covered in synthflesh so to look at him one would never know he'd lost it in the first place. Also, it appears he's got a blaster on his hip instead of a lightsaber.
Sighing, Anakin orders a drink and settles in to wait. The tip hadn't said when she'd be there, just that it was likely to be "soon".
He really hates waiting.
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Instead he just waves Ahsoka further into the ship and moves to close the ramp behind them so they can go sit down somewhere.
"Though it would be useful for keeping on the move," and they both know how important that's become for their kind.
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"Which comes in handy these days," Ahsoka agrees, finding the table space to sit down at and idly petting Artoo's dome as she relaxes there. "You know, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't curious about what you've been doing since we last saw one another."
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Anakin sits down across from her and raises his eyebrows, almost teasing, "you could just ask, you know."
But he won't push it, though he will skip a bit. There's a lot between 'since we last saw each other' and 'since I ran the hell away from Coruscant' that he's not sure he wants to get into just yet. Especially not when they've only just found each other again.
"So you know. The war ended and I barely made it off Coruscant alive." With his heavily pregnant secret wife and a few terrified Jedi younglings in tow. "Spent a while just jumping from system to system afraid to stay anywhere too long. But eventually we kind of...had to settle down."
It's possible he means him and Artoo when he says we but Ahsoka's smarter than that.
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So she has to wonder...
"I get the feeling it hasn't just been the two of you all this time."
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[ooc: I don't know if we decided where Obi-Wan went. Maybe he's helping deal with the younglings. 'Skywalker and Kenobi' are likely too noticeable to stay incognito for long.]
"Well," Anakin says slowly, "No, it hasn't been. Sen-"...hell, funny how the old force of habit pops up now. "-Padme came with me when we left Coruscant. She wasn't safe there either, Palpatine-..." he shakes his head sharply, cutting that line of thought off. Dwelling too much on what Palpatine might have done with his children is a good way to completely sidetrack them from this reunion. "And I managed to get a few younglings out of the Temple too."
And before she can ask too many questions about that..."how about you? What happened after Mandalore?"
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Padme. She's not surprised, but she is glad to know that the senator is safe- and that she probably has her friendship with the Organas to thank for Anakin having a hunch of where to find Ahsoka. As for younglings... That just makes her think of Hedala, the little Force sensitive girl she'd left on Thabeska. Maybe Anakin would know what to do about her. Maybe leaving her still is for the best.
"Well, first I had to get off Mandalore," Ahsoka starts dryly, shaking away that brief dark cloud of a thought. Hedala is fine, she reminds herself. "I wound up working as a mechanic, then a pilot. I helped people where I could, but those Force users the Empire has to track down former Jedi are no joke."
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"A mechanic and a pilot, huh? Guess you did learn some things from me after all," he teases.
Because teasing is better than wondering if he'd have been one of those Force users she's referring to. "I've heard rumors about them," he says slowly. "I don't even want to know how he found them." How many had he also taken from the Order? Or had they been disaffected Jedi, perhaps former padawans who'd left before being Knighted?
Anakin is suddenly devoutly thankful that Ahsoka isn't one of them.
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"The first one I encountered couldn't have been much older than you, though, and he wasn't familiar," Ahsoka says, although that doesn't necessarily mean much. She had known plenty of Jedi from the Temple, but almost certainly not all of them. "I don't think he was trained as a Jedi, not from how he fought, but he was undeniably strong in the Force."
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So what if he's a wee bit biased?
But Anakin frowns in thought anyway. Every single Jedi is now an enemy of the Republic. Do what must be done. Do not hesitate. Show no mercy. "They're never going to stop," he says after a moment, "hunting Jedi. Not until they're all gone." They, he says, not we.
"I'm sorry. I probably could have found something more cheerful to talk about. Like....the weather?"
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Instead, she forces a grin.
"That's a pretty good topic. The weather here always seems to be pleasant. Way better than some places I've visited, at least."
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"Might not be a bad place for a longer visit with a family," he muses thoughtfully. Then cocks his head in the general direction of the castle, "well, not in there."
But in general.
Remote enough not to draw much attention and pretty enough for a trip.
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Anakin wrinkles his nose, "well, smuggler is more likely now than Jedi."
Though he's fairly certain even if there still was an Order, he wouldn't have allowed it to take his children. He'd always sort of thought in the back of his mind he might have left it, himself, once the war was over. Then he has to remind himself that that's basically exactly what he did do...in just about as explosive fashion as possible.
"But I doubt Padme would care for that."
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Ahsoka leans forward, her smile less forced as she asks, "How is she, anyway?"
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Of course he'd never been able to entirely hide how he felt about Padme, particularly from those closest to him but there's a far more blatant warmth that colors his presence in the Force as the subject shifts to her. So what he feels for her feels more like a small supernova now compared to barely-controlled wildfire of before.
Or something like that, anyway.
"She's doing well," he smiles, "she thought I was crazy to be doing this. At first. She'll be glad to know you're safe, too." Anakin cocks his head to the side, studying her for a moment, "you should come visit."
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Because what if two Force users in the same place puts Padme in unnecessary danger? What if there's some reason that Bail hasn't recruited her into his blossoming rebellion yet? How many things could possibly go wrong?
"But I'm really glad to know you're both alright. I... feared the worst."
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That does not mean, however, that he doesn't still want her to see them. All of them. They'll just have to be careful in how they manage it.
So he straightens out his expression and nods. "It was..." Anakin's gaze goes distant a moment, as if he's gone somewhere else before he focuses on her again and smiling crookedly to cover the lapse, "....it was a close thing."
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"You didn't feel-" It didn't feel the same, Ahsoka wants to say of their connection, the one weathered by Barriss's betrayal and Ahsoka's decision to leave the Order, but one she'd still been able to feel when she'd left for the mission on Mandalore. She shakes her head, allowing herself a moment of being the uncertain young student she was to him not too long ago while she sorts out her words. "I couldn't reach out to you. And maybe it was safer that way, but I didn't think you were still alive, Anakin. I thought you were gone."
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In some ways he always will be. He may have walked away from Palpatine and turned away from what he'd been headed for but it had still followed him. There's a darkness trailing in his wake now greater than anything she might have sensed from him during the war even that when he'd wanted nothing more than to murder the man called Rako Hardeen for Obi-Wan's 'death'.
Slowly, he adds, "The- Palpatine wanted me to help him." And of course she knows how close Anakin had been to the former Chancellor.
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"That couldn't have been easy," she says, but doesn't clarify if she's talking about Palpatine asking him or him walking away. "But I'm glad that you didn't, for what it's worth."
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"Why?"
uggggh, been doing a lot of night shifts sorry
"I. Helped him. I wanted to believe the things he told me, I-..." Anakin shakes his head, "it doesn't matter. I was fool and I lied to myself as much as he lied to me." He doesn't meet her eyes, looking somewhere over her shoulder instead, "people think I died defending the Temple but the truth is that I was the one that led the attack."
no worries!
"But the Temple was a place of peace, I- Anakin," she breathes out finally, shaking her head, gaze dropping to the table. "I can't believe... What did he say to you? What made you do that?"
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"The Battle of Coruscant...we saved the Chancellor," we being him and Obi-Wan, of course. "I defeated Dooku." Killed an unarmed old man. "The war was basically over." Sure there was Grievous and the Separatist council but without Dooku managing things they were easy enough to deal with. "And Padme told she was pregnant. That we were going to have a child." He looks up at Ahsoka, raw emotion clear in his gaze when he speaks of his family. She knows just how far he's gone in the past for those he cares about. Including her.
"It was...a blessing I never thought to ask for. Never thought I'd be allowed to have. But then everything started falling apart. The Council wanted me to spy on Palpatine. Palpatine wanted me to inform on the Council." And trying to dividing Anakin's loyalties would have been difficult at the best of times which this clearly wasn't. "I was having visions of Padme dying horribly in childbirth. Palpatine was the only one that suggested any sort of actual solution." Which implied he'd tried to seek guidance from someone in the Jedi and come away not hearing what he'd wanted to. Certainly she knows the Jedi would've spoken of the will of the Force and celebrating those who become one with it.
"Palpatine told me he was the Sith lord. He told me how I could find the power to save Padme through the Dark Side. How we could bring peace and order to the galaxy. I didn't kneel to him then. I told Mace Windu. I thought we'd...I don't know. That we'd go together to arrest him, bring him to justice. Windu told me that if what I was telling him was true I would have finally won his trust." Bitterness coils around Anakin even now, thick and ugly and never properly purged. It takes him a moment to shove it back down again. "He took several Masters and they went to kill him, not arrest him. I ended up following but by the time I got there Mace was the only one still alive. He had Palpatine on the floor and was ready to kill him. We argued. I stopped him. Palpatine threw him out the window but it might as well have been me. And that's when I realized I'd chosen what the Sith offered over the Jedi." When he'd thought there was no other choice left to him and that that one step was enough that he couldn't turn back from it.
His tone is bleak, "that's what happened. If you want to leave I won't stop you."
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that icon's keyword....i lol'd