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Who do you need to forgive?
Oct. 22nd, 2005 11:37 pmEveryone thought and everyone believed that a child who was training to be a Jedi Knight never threw a tantrum. Everyone thought and everyone believed that Jedi children must be the most well-behaved children in the entire Galaxy. Everyone thought and believed this, of course, except for the Jedi themselves. Especially Jedi Masters with children for their Padawans.
Especially once particular Jedi Master who had been Master to his particular protege for less than a year.
Especially when said protege had locked himself in the 'fresher, refused to come out, and continually insisted that his Master was wrong. Just wrong!
Anakin, for that is who the young Padawan in question actually was, sat on the cold tile floor of the refresher and glared at the door in front of him. He was imagining he was glaring at Obi-Wan. For Obi-Wan, of course, is actually the Master in question. The older Jedi just didn't understand! He couldn't!
To understand how the two got into this position, it's necessary to back up a bit, to not much earlier in the day when Obi-Wan was teaching young Anakin about the nature of the Force and, inevitably, the subject of forgiveness had come up.
"But does that mean a Jedi has to forgive everyone?" Anakin had asked, wide-eyed.
Obi-Wan had nodded, "Of course, Anakin, how can the Jedi be protectors of peace and justice in the galaxy if even one of us is holding a grudge against someone? It is better to forgive them, to let the anger go, than to hold it inside you until it festers and grows."
It was then that young Anakin had shook his head, violently, "No! Some people are just bad and mean! Some people don't deserve it!"
Obi-Wan had tried to explain, but the youngster wouldn't listen, had in fact gotten up, run away, and locked himself up. And so we find ourselves where we entered the story...
Anakin sat on the cold tile floor still. Sat and glared at the door. Sat and glared at the door and thought about all the people he didn't, couldn't, wouldn't ever forgive. Like thatperson monster Sith who killed Qui-Gon. Like Sebulba. Like slavers. He wouldn't! And they didn't deserve it! How could you forgive someone who was cruel and evil? That was just crazy!
Obi-Wan was sitting on the floor too, staring at the locked door between him and his Padawan. In all honesty, the lock was a simple matter for someone skilled in the Force to open, however, he knew, somehow, that to force his way in would only damage the tenuous relationship he held with the boy. He wanted to shout in frustration. To bang his head against the door. To go away and leave the fool child alone. But of course, he did none of this. Instead, he waited, patiently, talking in a quiet, even tone all the while. The kind of tone that means a child can't shout at you if he wants to hear you. The kind of tone that could only just barely be heard with a door between them. He talked about all kinds of things, about how forgiveness wasn't easy, but how it was needed, how important it was, how much better it made one feel afterwards. He spoke of how even he found it difficult to forgive people -- and did not mention who it was he'd meant -- but that he still knew it was the right thing to do. The young Jedi Master talked for what seemed like hours, stubbornly refusing to give up on the child on the other side of the door.
It seemed like hours to Anakin, too. But slowly, very slowly, as Obi-Wan spoke, the boy crept closer to the door between them. Slowly, ever so slowly, he reached up to unlock the door. And ever more slowly, he finally opened it and peered out at his Master, greeting the older Jedi with a tearstained face. "I hate them, I don't want to forgive them."
Obi-Wan smiled gently and gathered the boy up in his arms carefully, "It hurts too much to hate, Anakin, let go of your hate, forgive them, not for their own sakes, but for yours."
Anakin thought about that, and for a moment, just a moment, he really understood clearly what Obi-Wan was saying. He cried more, unashamed. Cried until he slept. And slept more soundly than he ever had since he had come to Coruscant.
===
Muse: Anakin Skywalker
Fandom: Star Wars
Especially once particular Jedi Master who had been Master to his particular protege for less than a year.
Especially when said protege had locked himself in the 'fresher, refused to come out, and continually insisted that his Master was wrong. Just wrong!
Anakin, for that is who the young Padawan in question actually was, sat on the cold tile floor of the refresher and glared at the door in front of him. He was imagining he was glaring at Obi-Wan. For Obi-Wan, of course, is actually the Master in question. The older Jedi just didn't understand! He couldn't!
To understand how the two got into this position, it's necessary to back up a bit, to not much earlier in the day when Obi-Wan was teaching young Anakin about the nature of the Force and, inevitably, the subject of forgiveness had come up.
"But does that mean a Jedi has to forgive everyone?" Anakin had asked, wide-eyed.
Obi-Wan had nodded, "Of course, Anakin, how can the Jedi be protectors of peace and justice in the galaxy if even one of us is holding a grudge against someone? It is better to forgive them, to let the anger go, than to hold it inside you until it festers and grows."
It was then that young Anakin had shook his head, violently, "No! Some people are just bad and mean! Some people don't deserve it!"
Obi-Wan had tried to explain, but the youngster wouldn't listen, had in fact gotten up, run away, and locked himself up. And so we find ourselves where we entered the story...
Anakin sat on the cold tile floor still. Sat and glared at the door. Sat and glared at the door and thought about all the people he didn't, couldn't, wouldn't ever forgive. Like that
Obi-Wan was sitting on the floor too, staring at the locked door between him and his Padawan. In all honesty, the lock was a simple matter for someone skilled in the Force to open, however, he knew, somehow, that to force his way in would only damage the tenuous relationship he held with the boy. He wanted to shout in frustration. To bang his head against the door. To go away and leave the fool child alone. But of course, he did none of this. Instead, he waited, patiently, talking in a quiet, even tone all the while. The kind of tone that means a child can't shout at you if he wants to hear you. The kind of tone that could only just barely be heard with a door between them. He talked about all kinds of things, about how forgiveness wasn't easy, but how it was needed, how important it was, how much better it made one feel afterwards. He spoke of how even he found it difficult to forgive people -- and did not mention who it was he'd meant -- but that he still knew it was the right thing to do. The young Jedi Master talked for what seemed like hours, stubbornly refusing to give up on the child on the other side of the door.
It seemed like hours to Anakin, too. But slowly, very slowly, as Obi-Wan spoke, the boy crept closer to the door between them. Slowly, ever so slowly, he reached up to unlock the door. And ever more slowly, he finally opened it and peered out at his Master, greeting the older Jedi with a tearstained face. "I hate them, I don't want to forgive them."
Obi-Wan smiled gently and gathered the boy up in his arms carefully, "It hurts too much to hate, Anakin, let go of your hate, forgive them, not for their own sakes, but for yours."
Anakin thought about that, and for a moment, just a moment, he really understood clearly what Obi-Wan was saying. He cried more, unashamed. Cried until he slept. And slept more soundly than he ever had since he had come to Coruscant.
===
Muse: Anakin Skywalker
Fandom: Star Wars
